Now What Will We Do With the Babies?

The "this has nothing to do with abortion" pro-embryonic stem-call research crowd took a shot to the chin this weekend as a new study, completed by scientists in Pittsburgh, provided some startling results.

It had been thought that embryonic stem cells were more "robust," which provided the perfect impetus to create breeding farms of little, very early stage tots, for harvest as a research tool that, despite that he is already dead, might still save Christopher Reeves. New research though, shows adult stem cells to be just as resilient as baby ones, despite the fact that 51% percent of those cells hold the dreaded "voted for Bush" gene.

If the study indeed holds up to scrutiny, it will be a devastating blow to an entire sect of the American population that was much more comfortable with science when it came at the expense of another human life. Rumor has it that, following their successful campaign to prolong human life by at least a year or two on average by creating "Matrix"-like baby trees, the next step would have been to declassify all of the wonderful medical advances by Nazi doctors, who performed valuable research on people who, "let's face it" they say, were going to die anyway.

This new study puts a major dent in those plans.

The cry has gone out from Blue America already. "Without scientific advances to fall back on, how will we further erode Jesus-land's irrational attachment to 'life?'" one well-intentioned liberal asked rhetorically. Another simply sat on a curb at the local herbal medicine store and wept uncontrollably.

Nevertheless, the battle is far from over. In a frightfully organized campaign, pro-baby farm forces are calling on all of there friends in the main-stream media to insure that the messsage of this study does not reach the average American. "It simply would not do to have all of these medical advances come from adult stem cells, when the same research could be done, and we could farm babies," said one local do-gooder, who sees embryonic stem cell research as "the killing of two birds with one stone," if indeed that pun can be pardoned.

One thing is clear. If those who prefer "backwoods" science, which seeks to prolong and perhaps even save lives without the added benefit of embryo factories, they will face an uphill battle. As many of the deeply-caring leftists that I interviewed indicated, "this isn't just about research. This is about our right to use fetuses for things that makes sense, like medical research, biodegradable fertilizer, or even a tasty garnish."

Also posting: ProLife Blogs, Stones Cry Out.